Winning and losing

Each time I hear about winning and losing, one icon towers above … Vince Lombardi. I remember one of his many quotes, “Show me a good loser, and I’ll show you a loser.”

In all matters, sports, career, or life, never settle. It doesn’t necessarily mean to be first, second, third. This can refer to the individual who goes through life playing it safe, not taking chances. Life can mean many different things for each person, but one thing for certain is you should do something to improve it. Do something!

You ever get that feeling where you sat around all day, without a worry, go to sleep and wake up the next day refreshed? Not unless you were sick all day, right? If you were able-bodied and for one day you just stared at the wall and did nothing constructive, the next day your energy level would still be as deficient as it was the prior day. On the other hand, what about where you ran around all day doing errands, taking care of things back-to-back, to the point where by the time you laid to bed at night you felt like you conquered the world? This is because you prepared a list of things to accomplish, in a period of time, and you saw it to completion. You competed to check off your list, you put your game face on, and you succeeded.

To win in anything you have to compete. When you compete, you put all your efforts toward that goal and you finish the job. These actions help you win. Don’t go into things half-heartedly. If you do, you might as well not take on the challenge.

Not only do you need to do it because of you, but there are others that may be watching. In a boxing match you have two individuals ready to pound each other to pieces, or so their press conferences show. Finally in that first round of their match you see the intensity of the winner, and you see the unpreparedness of the loser. You can already see in your head the ending where the boxer will say he was not ready, didn’t train properly, etc. Why would you get in the ring with someone you’ve been talking crap about? You have to play to win, not to lose.

Not to take anything from anyone’s talent … thank you Manny Pacquaio for an awesome two-round knockout this weekend … but talent is sometimes not enough. When your mind is not in the right mindset to win, you will not win. When your preparation is not at peak capacity, you cannot expect to win. I hate to call people winners and losers, so I’ll let Lombardi do it for me, “Show me a good loser, and I’ll show you a loser.” Get two prepared, motivated, and talented boxers in the ring, and you will get a slug fest that EVERYONE will be on their feet on, no matter the outcome. In the end people will remember each fighter's determination and focus to win. How do YOU want to be remembered in your actions in the workplace, in the home, or in your life ... as a winner or as a loser?

When you enter into competitions, do so with a focus to win. When you enter a new role in your career, do so with a focus to win. When you enter a new stage in a relationship, do so with a focus to win. Otherwise don’t even bother. There will be some rough spots along the way, but that’s expected for anything worthwhile tackling. Another Lombardi quote is, “The real glory is being knocked down to your knees and then coming back. That’s real glory. That’s the essence of it.” When you pour all your efforts in to win you cannot lose, as one final Lombardi quote that says it the best, “We didn’t lose the game; we just ran out of time.”

Psych yourself to win, and prepare for a battle that may suck the energy and wits out of you. However, put your mind in a state of winning. Doing so influences your action, and your actions will lead to a result. Which mindset do you have right now, to win or to lose?

Oakley-dokely!

Begin with the end in mind

Many goals are set, while just as many remain just goals. Take for instance the traditional influx of gym memberships sold around New Year’s, let alone the sales of prepaid personal training sessions. I’m not here to talk about the genius of these marketing pushes around the first of the year, rather to discuss the goals that never make it past the first week of February.

I’m betting that many of these goal setters have great intentions, but lacked focus. It is not normally easy to maintain focus; it’s actually quite challenging. Focus takes a lot of effort, and as humans we are naturally out of focus all the time. You have to intend on staying in focus. Think about the time you had a great workout: your favorite sports drink flowing through you, your sweat pouring through your pores, and an hour later your adrenaline levels are soaring. On your next workout you concentrate on the previous workout: comparing your efforts to your current workout, feeling lackluster for not matching up, and next thing you know you’re workout is just a waste of your time and energy. The next workout you concentrate on your subpar workout and continue the cycle. Next thing you know you’ve lost the motivation to work out and your gym membership becomes a memory. Why is that?

Distractions such as “what I did yesterday” chip away at your focus. Learn from the past and let go of it. Most drivers, I hope, get into a car and drive defensively, just as we were taught in driver’s education. Look ahead, check your side mirrors, check the rear view mirror… After all that checking, I certainly hope you don’t forget about the road immediately in front of you. Using “what I did yesterday” to get you through today is just like driving a car and perpetually staring at your rear view mirror. Do not be distracted by yesterday. Focus on today. You cannot change the past. You are not into tomorrow. Focus on today, since you have control to shape today.

When you did not achieve success in your workout goal yesterday, do you throw in the towel?

Success is not an event, it is a process. Any champion will tell you that that this process takes a considerable amount of time. When time is involved maintaining focus is essential. Think about the kind of challenges did Hank Aaron have to overcome. Aaron said, “I think what separates a superstar from the average ballplayer is that he concentrates just a little bit longer.” Are your challenges relatively comparable to the ones Aaron had to face day-in-day-out? Those that can direct their focus to complement their talent, condition themselves to reach various levels of success.

Make every action count. Determine where you want to go and how you’re going to get there. Remember the rearview mirror driving example. Begin with the end in mind. I know friends that occasionally drive cross county. We can learn a lesson from these hard core drivers. They map out point A to point B. They know how many miles it will take. They know how many days it will take. They know how many pit stops they will take to reach point B. They know what point B looks like, so they’ll know they arrived. It doesn’t matter that there was ugly weather in the last state. It doesn’t matter that a thousand miles away if there will be a stalled vehicle that might cause a traffic delay. What matters is that this very moment, driving at night when traffic is lighter, that the driver needs to:

· Focus on staying awake

· Focus on as far as the headlights are lighting the way

· Focus on reaching a predetermined end of this stage of the journey

· Focus on reaching point B

Without maintaining focus, how will you reach your goal? Stay focused on results, not the difficulties involved. Maintaining focus conditions you for self-discipline, not self-pity. Challenge your excuses (as that’s what they are, right?). The clock is ticking and you don’t have enough time for excuses. Focus lifts you and increases your energy. Why? You get to momentarily enjoy your mini-wins that lead up to bigger wins.

My friends know that I work out to stay in shape, and to keep up with my active five- and seven-year old boys. That is my focus. My focus is not to be able to bench press Smart cars in my spare time. However, I do have a friend who has focused on more massive goals. Strength training was key to him in football, baseball, and track & field. As he continued on with progressing in his career in IT and completing his masters degree in Computer Systems Management, he maintained focus in his body building goal. Some of his successes along the way include:

· 1^st place and overall – NPC Lenda Murray Classic

· 1^st place – NPC Maryland State Champion

· Four IPA World Records – 275 lb. class

· Eight-time Maryland State Bench Press Champion

· Six-time Maryland State Powerlifting Champion

· Three-time Eastern National Champion

· Two-time National Champion

Recently, Sherwin (“Big Sherwin”) Pagtakhan was recognized by a sponsorship from Muscletech, beginning yet another stage of an incredible journey. Every bit of success builds to the next level of success. If the current stage of success takes a bit more time, would you consider Big Sherwin unsuccessful?

In seven weeks Big Sherwin has a major competition which I know the preparation will test him further. What’s involved is quite a handful: diet, gym time, diet, family time, diet, career, diet… Focus will be key in mapping his point A to point B over the next seven weeks. This stage of his journey is not unlike previous stages. It doesn’t matter what he did yesterday. It doesn’t matter what he’ll do five weeks from now. All that matters is today. He didn’t get to the big leagues haphazardly, but through focus. Big Sherwin, your friends and family are pulling for you. More importantly, we know your focus will pull you through.

Begin with the end in mind. Plan each stage of success that will get you to point B. Maintain focus!

Oakley-dokely!